I've had my locks for one whole month now (install date 9/13). I cannot tell all of you how much this process is changing me. I'm having to address my fears, superficial and otherwise, about my hair. Do I want my hair to grow every night? Yes!!! Do I worry if I've done the right thing with my locks? Absolutely! There are times that I don't want to tie it up, where I don't want to curl the ends, where I don't want to bundle before washing, etc.
But, there are other times that it is my source of healing. I look at how my hair has been damaged and ruined and how it is still fighting its way back - even though I tried killing it. I have covered it with braids, weaves, glue and other things so many times.
I have started relationships with tons of fake hair and then expected people to love the real me. I've doubted my own beauty and my own sense of worth in the workforce because of my hair. I've doubted friendships, love, family members when they have to see me in my natural state. How could they really want to be with the true me?
This has been a growing process and its just the beginning. My girlfriend greets me with "Hello beautiful" all of the time and I even don't want to accept that because of my insecurities but it is getting easier. I thank God for my locs, for my love and family, and for the support of the blog! See ya in a month
2 comments:
after a month with your locks i think that your hair is showing remarkable recovery and growth. plus i love to play in them as they feel so cool and it's great to see you with your natural hair anyway! kisses sweet!
s
ps your loc anniversary is the same as ours -- groovy!
s
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