188

Its just a number I know but 188 to me is 28.8 pounds given away. Given away to a disease of compulsion to eat and eat and eat. Its years of thinking that extra cake was going to make me happy. That bliss came in nachos. That no one would love the real me. I have had a beautiful last few years. I have gone up and down and over and under as you know but today I have made a turning point. Over the last few weeks really. I have pushed my body to the limits, lifted heavy weights, hiked up a mountain and did the elliptical.

Throughout the next few months my journey continues. One realistic expectation is that I keep writing about my feelings and thoughts, keep being natural with myself and keep doing good for others. I feel this is why I'm here. Really not to go through a battle with weight but to be a soldier in the army of right. Not holier than thou right but right enough to see something right in front of me and try to make a difference.

I'm starting with leaving the focus of "me" and turning it to community. I am starting by volunteering at a homeless shelter for youth simply by being there and listening to teenagers from time to time. The agency is called Urban Peak http://www.urbanpeak.org/. I'm excited about this new journey and I hope I do my higher power justice!

As I continue to grow & give away I am also amazed at my hair. Its interesting that just like my weight, the less I focus on it and just let it be and shine on its own the better it does.